Sunday, November 16, 2008

Top Ten List


Here is a list of the top ten things your children can do to make you cry. Actually, there are sooooo many more than this, but these are things that actually happened to me.


10. Finding poop (five BIG ONES!) on the ceiling in your two sons' bedroom just before you leave for work.

9. Wondering why the Vaseline is open on the bathroom counter, followed by wondering why your hair just will not dry while you are blow drying it, followed by screaming (and gasping for air between words) "WHOOOOOOOO...GOOOOOOT...VASALIIIIIIIIIIIINE...INNNNNNNNNN...MYYYYYYYYYY......HAIRRRRRRR-BRUSHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!????" just before you need to leave for work.

8. Getting a call from the school Principal, while you are at work, informing you that your Kindergartner has been suspended after only five days of school.

7. Getting a call from your husband telling you that he just wanted to let you know that the fire department is on the way over to the house but not to worry because he already put out the fire in your six year-old's closet.

6. Waking up in the middle of the night to discover your two boys (ages two and three) creating a very, very large swirly mixture of mustard, milk and laundry detergent in the middle of their bedroom floor in your rented apartment.

5. Waking up from a blissful Sunday afternoon nap to discover your two boys (yes the same ones) creating a very, very large swirly mixture of milk, raw eggs, ORANGE JUICE and BAKING SODA (just the last two alone are a volatile mixture - do not try this at home) in the carpeted hallway outside your bedroom door (again in your rented apartment).

4. Getting a call from the Principal (five years after your middle son was suspended from Kindergarten on the fifth day of school) informing you that your youngest son is being suspended from Kindergarten after only five days of school.

3. Waking up at 2:00am to the sound of suspicious noise outside your apartment window to discover that your four year old daughter figured out how to unlock her bedroom window so she could go outside and play.
2. Waking up in the middle of the night in your brand new house to discover your two boys (again - the same two culprits listed above) creating another very swirly mixture of mustard, ketchup and eggs in the middle of the carpet in their brand new room. WHAT IS IT WITH THE NEED TO MIX CONDIMENTS AND VARIOUS OTHER INGREDIENTS IN THE CARPET?


OK, I cant take it any more. The above nine were all quite horrific experiences for me and there are soooo many more I haven't listed.

What is your number one thing? Please add your comment with the top thing your child or children have done to make you cry. :-)

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